When meeting a partner.. Its like a joy you never felt. A refreshing drink to quench your thirst, a touch you sought; it is an amazing feeling. Its funny because when its new its exciting. Every part of that person makes your body, mind, and soul click. You long to talk to the person, touch that person, text that person, hang out with that person etc.
But around the 3-6 month mark things that once were cute and enjoyable begin to wear you thin, things that you overlooked are now very present. The "creativity" they once had begins to look like "laziness". The make it work sex is not unsatisfying. The occasional bad breath is now often funky and unbearable.
The person you once wanted to have their last name and children for is looking more and more like a distant nightmare. Ugh how and why do we get here. What makes the love, excitement, kindness, googly eyes dissipate? I have found it is often due to people getting into relationships unaware of who they are, what they want in a relationship and being clear on what you want from a partner.
Relationships can be wonderful, life long and most importantly complimentary to you. But the mere fact is if you aren't taking the necessary steps prior to entering the relationship the outcome is often always the same. Before entering a relationship ask yourself -Who am I? This is important to know. So often we connect with people and take on their norms, ideals, agenda's etc. This is often how people become frustrated with their significant others because self identity was NEVER identified prior to the connection. You will actually find yourself waking up to a stranger(yourself). In this moment you will find yourself unsatisfied and unfulfilled.
Be clear on what you want. I absolutely cant get with a person that does not have a plan. You need to know what you want before attaching to another person. This is specifically important because although the sex can be great, hanging out with this person may be absolutely amazing and well they are available when you want them to be. You will soon discover that their ideals of relationships, goals, or relationship journey maybe completely different from what you are seeking. Be clear and if the stars don't align LEAVE ASAP. Time is precious don't waste yours or anyone else.
Take the time to seek out what your partner wants. Being mislead is a real thing. I have met so many people that are ok with going with the flow but their intentions are absolutely NOT what you want. People are selfish and make things work for them. Sadly many people will go with the flow to keep you quiet and satisfy their own desires at the same time. These kind of people make me sick!! I often have to question are we adults? Lying is so childlike and it is truly unnecessary. We all have a friend that is ok with dating a married, lying cheat. We all have been down the road where we are knowingly seeing this person can not meet our needs but we continue with it because it is comfortable. STOP IT. Be deliberate in the people you connect with and get the love you deserve.
Until we chat again,
Confessions of a Insecure Woman
P.S. feel free to leave a comment, like and subscribe.
Have you heard Life Coach services are available, sign up today.